Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Big Den


“He made us laugh and he made us cry”. (Thank You Colleen, for so eloquently capturing my Dad, his life and his impact on all of us). Such a simple phrase and yet holds so much truth.

Anyone who knew my Dad or was in his presence for a brief amount of time knew he loved to laugh. It was a loud and hearty laughter, the kind that makes your face turn red and your body shakes. Anyone who knew him also knew he was usually laughing at his own jokes & antics. He filled any room he entered with energy and noise. Timid he was not and I don’t think shy was in his vocabulary. He was loud, in your face, in your business and ...dare I say, a little bit nosey. However, it was these traits that I believe made him lovable.

My Dad made it into the hearts of almost anyone he met. He found his way in there and somehow, he stayed there. If he loved you, he made sure you knew it everyday. I never doubted my Dad’s love for his family or me. It was always there. His honesty, though sometimes brutal and unwarranted, was completely sincere. He wore his tired heart on his sleeve in such a brazen way. I admire that in people and I admired it in him.

Dennis had such a particular way of doing everything. Everything had its process, complete with its own set of little rules. So detailed, even down to the tiniest of ordinary tasks. If we ran low on mustard and the messy yellow bottle was squirting and sputtering with every squeeze, Jenna and I dare not throw it away! I can remember I got yelled at a few times and he’d take the plastic bottle of Gulden’s out of my hand, pull open the drawer, take out a sharp knife and cut the bottle in half to allow for easy access. We’d then proceed to scrape the plastic with a butter knife until it was gone.

My Dad was very hard worker. I think when did something – anything– it was in his nature to do it well. He not only taught me to work towards a goal, to earn good grades and better myself but, for a long time during my childhood, he showed me. For that I could never thank him enough.

From approximately the ages of 8-13, I could probably tell you every football team and the city that they represented. I was trained and drilled repeatedly and I would by lying if I said I didn’t love it. Every evening in the living room my dad and I would sit for hours and sharpen my skills, every team from the obscure and not so popular to his beloved EAGLES. If only they had won the Superbowl this year…his life, in his mind, would be complete. We’ll get ‘em next year Dad and we know you’ll be watching as the Birds take it home.

Everything that was truly my Dad – his meticulous nature, his booming voice, his infectious laugh and his understanding spirit, will always be with me and with all who loved him. The painful reality of his last few weeks is indeed hard to shake and unfortunately serves as a grim reminder of his weaknesses. He ran and ran and ran until his soul gave out. Yet he never ever stopped loving. He never wavered in his sincere love for his family, especially Jenna, my mom and I. My dad is someone who deserves to be cried for.

He leaves behind a loving Mother (Mom Mom Jeanne) and a courageous sister (Aunt Jeanne) both of whom are to be admired for their tremendous strength. He was very sadly predeceased by his father and his amazing brother (Uncle Jimmy), who I know if he were here today, would be a pillar of strength and stability.

As for Jenna, my mom and I, I know we’ll be OK. We watched him struggle and grow tired for a long time and I think how we can finally breathe a comfortable sigh of relief, for he is enjoying the ultimate peace.

In the movie “Shawshank Redemption”, the character Red is reflecting on the character of Andy Dufrane. He says:

“I have to remind myself that some birds aren't meant to be caged. Their feathers are just too bright. And when they fly away, the part of you that knows it was a sin to lock them up does rejoice. Still, the place you live in is that much more drab and empty that they're gone. I guess I just miss my friend.”

We, too, will miss our friend, brother, son and Dad.

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

1254 Wycombe Ave.


Leaky Eyes is my grandmother. We call her Leaky for short. I made up that nickname for her after Jackie turned to me one day, one of the first times she had met my mom's mom and said,

"Kris, do you know that your grandmother's eyes constantly leak?"

Of course I knew that; they had been leaking for as long as I could remember. Ever since I would go to the house she shared with my Grandpop everyday after school. Their house, the end row home, was surrounded by a huge yard and around the yard was a green chainlink fence. I would arrive at the house after a long day of 3rd grade and ever-so-quietly open the gate. I tried to never make a noise, so that I could sneak up on my Grandpop in his chair as he watched The Price Is Right.

On days where I must have had a lot to drink at school, I would race up the cement steps, through the teeny foyer and into the living room of their house, the plush red carpet at my feet.

"Here she comes!", my Grandpop would yell. "Her shoes are off, her backpack down, and she's right up the stairs, that was a record folks!" And I was up the narrow stairway to the bathroom.

It's funny the things you remember.

Leaky is moving soon. No, she doesn't know that we call her that. Her name is Margaret, like my mom, more affectionately known as Babe to her sisters and friends. So Grandmom Babe is moving soon. Settlement for a little condo in Boothwyn is Friday, May 26th. I find myself over at her house more and more often. It is like I know it won't be there long.

Down the basement steps, in place of a banister, are long, beaded hangings. Things you might see in some sort of Tarrot readings place, or a hippie's bedroom. These...beaded hangings (hangings is the only word I can think of to use) have been there forever also. My Mom said they'd been there since she was a little girl. She used to grab a handful of them and pretend they were her hair. I did the same thing and often.

The smell of the house will never leave me. It's cooking and garlic and moth balls and permanent solution. This may be a good time to mention that Babe is a hairdresser (just like Mom) and has a small saloon in her basement. My Grandpop won the lottery and had it built for her and then he won again and put a bathroom down there. It's small, but serves its purpose of a meeting place for all of her friends to come and have their silver hair washed, cut, dried, dyed and curled. During those afternoons after school, I would venture down there and sweep the hair from the floor. The old ladies would dote. My Grandmom would boast. She still does.

Yesterday, I came for dinner and had to rush in to go to the bathroom. My Grandpop was not there for the play-by-play and there was no schoolbag on my back. It was eerily familiar.

It's funny the things you remember...

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Happy Birthday Dad


May 3 is my Dad's birthday. He was born on 5/3/53. He would have been 53 today. He was really weird with numbers, he always made a big deal if numbers matched up in interesting ways. On my birthday in 2004, he made a big deal because it was 04/04/04.

I am playing the lottery today. Do I think I will win? Hell no....

I just want to.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Today

I like this idea:

Today's Challenges:
-knee is killing me
-crazy work day


Today's Blessings:
-American Idol
-my Kenny tickets came today!
-an excellent client call this morning
-I remembered my water bottle
-my cold is almost gone

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

My body is failing me

I am only 25....why?

Torn ligament around my kneecap. Ok, am I a runner? hardly..

Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, mild, but still there. No surgery needed yet.

Being tested for rheumetoid arthritis.

I am officially 25, but my body seems to think I am 78.

Vent/complaining/me being a baby over....I am not feeling well, needed an outlet.

It's DONE!

Thursday, April 20, 2006

She Needed to Know

She needed to know
She needed to know it was there
That it would always be there
That she could always come home...




Image hosting by Photobucket
Related Posts with Thumbnails